So, because I am a sinner, I am not really in a position to pass judgment on others.  But, there is a friend that I have on Facebook who’s actions really bother me.  I wonder if he has stopped to consider his words.

You see, this fellow that I am friends with on Facebook, at first, came across to me as a very religious person.  Every day on Facebook he posted things about his Christianity and religious type messages.  I always thought he was a very nice guy.  In fact, a week or so before the New Year, he posted a message saying:

My goal for 2012 is to be more like Jesus.

Is his attitude really Christian?

Nothing at all wrong with that, it’s commendable.  If we were all more like Jesus, the world would probably be a better place.

A couple of days after he posted this, he started posting what I would consider hate filled messages on Facebook.  In fact, the other day, he posted a message talking about US President Barack Obama.  He said that Obama is the biggest crook in the world.  He then went on to say that he is planning to vote for Obama to get reelected, so that Obama may get arrested for some crime.  He went so far as to say that he hopes that the American people will hang Obama just like the Iraqis did to Saddam Hussein.

Huh?

Is that really a Christian attitude?  I think not.  In fact, even if this person had not shown himself previously to be a devout Christian, I would still have a problem with his statement about hanging the President.  I am not an Obama supporter, in fact I am a life long Republican.  But, this is not about Politics.  I would never hope for a President to be killed by the people.  The US has had a number of Presidents who have been assassinated, and that just never has helped the country in any way.  In fact, it is a sick thing to say, in my opinion.

After reading over this statement and really pondering it for a while, I found myself even questioning my Christianity, which I know is not the correct reaction.  But, I felt like, if this guy is a devout Christian, is that what I want to be associated with?  As I continued to think, I realized that this kind of action or statement is not what Jesus would have condoned, so his statement is not consistent with the religion or belief system that he espouses.

Hatred is never a good habit.  Listening to such hatred is a bad habit too, something that I should not have done, and certainly should not have allowed to influence me.  But, then again, judging him, which I did is also a bad habit for me.  It’s all very confusing, but also has really impacted me for a couple of days now.

Even if you are doing things that you enjoy and love doing, if you overextend yourself and take on too much, it becomes burdensome.

For example, I enjoy publishing on the Internet, it is a passion of mine.  Of course, all of my websites are focused on topics that I am passionate about and enjoy writing about.  But, it is inevitable that I take on too much.  I put up too many websites, to the point where I get behind in writing on many of my sites.  Once I get behind, then I sort of get depressed that I am not keeping up to the schedule that I expect from myself.  Once I get depressed, then it discourages me from writing further, thus putting me further behind schedule.  It’s a vicious circle, frankly.

Are you overextended financially or otherwise?

What about you?  Does this sort of “over extension” happen in your life?  Maybe it’s your work, as it is for me.  Maybe it’s  a hobby or something else in your life.  I enjoy helping people and could easily over extend myself on that.  In terms of assisting people, I like helping poor people by giving them things.  I recently went and bought a basketball to give to a poor child that I know.  With this kind of assistance, if you do too much of it, you are not going to get behind schedule, but you may leave yourself in financial trouble.  So far, I have been able to no allow that to happen, but I only use it as an example.  When it comes to this kind of assistance, I always enjoy it and get a smile on my face when I am able to assist somebody, but if I were to let myself go into financial disaster, it certainly would not be pleasant.

Ever heard the saying that too much of a good thing can be bad?  The things I am talking about are all good things.  Things that I enjoy.  But, if you take on too much you will become burned out, behind schedule, and stressed.  Overextending yourself is certainly not a good habit.  A smart person will do what is necessary in order not to become overextended.

Following a schedule is very important, and it’s a good habit, don’t you think?

Personally, I think not.

Yes, you read that right.  I don’t think that following a schedule very closely is a good habit.  In fact, I would argue the opposite.  It may well be that throwing your schedule out is much more productive in the long run.

How can that be?  Well, let me share my thoughts.

Schedule

You see, I do believe we should keep a “to-do” list, a list of the things that we need to get done.  Once you make your to-do list, though, I believe it is more productive to do the things on the list that you want to do.  Yes, there may be important things that you need to get done, but if you force yourself to do things you don’t want to do, well, you likely will not be very productive during the time that you are forcing yourself to do something that you don’t want to do.

Instead, I would advocate that we all know what things on our to-do list are important to get done.  We will have to do those things, without a doubt, but what is best to do, in my opinion, is to do those things when we are “in the mood” and feeling productive about doing them.  In fact, when you are feeling a spurt of energy about something on your list, I would say that you should get to it, and work on that activity.  Keep doing it as long as you are productive and feeling compelled to do it.  Those are the times when you will be most productive, and you will most certainly get the most done on the project.  During other times, do something else, hopefully something else that is productive – another project, or some self-improvement item.

So, while we all need to get all of our work done, don’t try to schedule yourself in advance.  Just make yourself aware of what you need to get done, and be mature enough to get it done before the deadline, at the times when you feel a passion for that particular project.  You’ll find yourself getting more and more done that way, without feeling that you are constantly working.

Come on, we have all done stupid things many times, even if we are smart.

How about doing something stupid at the exact time when everybody is watching you?  It can certainly be embarrassing to do something like that.

But, it happens.  No matter how hard we try, we will fail sometimes, and we can’t stop that.  The key, though, is to minimize it.  Use your brand and your intelligence to do smart things.

Speaking of doing something stupid when people are watching… can you imagine being in the stands at a televised baseball game, and the cameras focus in on you just when you do something that is, well, let’s say, not very smart?

Ha ha… not smart!

There is a fellow whom I know, although we have never met in person.  I know him only through the Internet.  For some reason, I’m not even sure why, I never liked the guy.  Somehow, on the Internet, he rubbed me the wrong way.  I don’t remember what it was, but I suppose that probably on the first time we had any dialogue on the net, he said something that I didn’t like.  I don’t know how he felt about me.  Maybe he didn’t like me, maybe he liked me, I can’t say for sure.  But, I didn’t like him.

Shaking Hands

Yesterday, I found out some new things about the fellow.  To be honest, I saw him on a TV show yesterday.  He said some things while being interviewed on the show that made me realize that I had judged him prematurely, and that my judgement of him was wrong.  In fact, after seeing him interviewed on the show, I kind of like the guy.

In fact, there is a third person whom I trust very much, and he also knows this fellow whom I had misjudged.  I mentioned this to that third person, and he said “oh yeah, he is a real good guy!”  Made me feel kind of bad for having judged the man when I really didn’t have enough information to do so accurately.

So, I am going to do my best to remember that making a judgment, unless it is based on hard evidence, is not a good thing to do.  Judgment should be reserved until it is deserved, and is accurate.  It’s a good habit to handle it that way, and I’m going to do my best.

What?  A smart person doing stupid things?

You better believe it!

Hey, we all do stupid things from time to time.  I can think of a lot of times when I have done something stupid.  It can be embarrassing, and when you do something stupid, probably the first thing you do is take a peek around you to see if anybody witnessed your stupid act.

How can we overcome doing something stupid.  Well, we can minimize stupid acts by simply being more careful and thinking through our actions a little more instead of acting impulsively.  However, we can never completely eliminate doing stupid things.

Take a look at this video that I found on YouTube:

Come on now… we’ve all done some pretty stupid things.  Can you share with us a story about a stupid thing that you’ve done?

Of course, when you do something stupid, you will be embarrassed.  However, don’t you think it is healthier and just all around better to just admit our stupidity in the moment, and taking a few minutes to just laugh at what we did?  I think so.

Does tearing another person down build up the person doing the tearing down?  I don’t think so.  In fact, by tearing others down, especially when done publicly, I believe that the person is actually making himself look small.

Today, I saw a quote from a friend on Facebook:

Winners use hard arguments but soft words;
Losers use soft arguments but hard words.

Teddy Roosevelt's big stick

When I saw this quote, I really fell in love with it, almost immediately.  I feel it is related to the tearing down of others, and trying to make yourself look good by doing that.

I find the quote is very true, also.  It kind of relates back to the words of Teddy Roosevelt:

Speak softly, but carry a big stick.

Of course, the “big stick” is the wisdom and strength of the words used in the argument.  Facts.  If you argue the facts, you can never lose.  If you are arguing without any facts, and do so by simply amplifying your voice in the argument, well, you will not be the winner, except in your own eyes.

Big Stick

There is really something to be said for Teddy Roosevelt’s words about speaking softly while carrying a big stick.  Do you remember, last week, I wrote about the celebrations on the streets of the USA after the killing of Usama bin Laden?  That, in my opinion, was not “soft” speaking, but being loud and boisterous.  That was an example of speaking loudly while carrying a big stick, and was unnecessary.

I suppose that if you have a small stick, or no stick at all, you don’t have much choice but to speak softly, or so it would seem.  But, come to think of it, some of the loudest people have little or no stick with which to win their fight.  I am talking, for the most part, about people who are internet bullies, and belittle people.  Most of these people really have no facts at all, but they think that by speaking loudly they will be the winner.

Frankly, I think that Teddy Roosevelt had a lot of the right thinking.  Speaking softly is always a good thing.  Having a big stick has it’s benefits too!

I must say, I was happy that bin Laden was finally dealt justice, it was a long time coming.  I feel that what bin Laden received was certainly coming to him, and I only wish he had gotten his justice many years ago.

Usama bin Laden was the mastermind and financier of many terrorist attacks over the years.  Perhaps one of the earliest attacks with bin Laden’s fingerprints was the 1993 bombing of the World Trade Centers in New York.  Over the years, up to 2001 bin Laden struck many other targets as well.  Of course, on September 11, 2001, bin Laden’s biggest attack occurred, again on the World Trade Centers, and a couple of other targets in the United States.

Celebration of bin Laden's death

When I saw the announcement by President Obama, I was happy that the rein of bin Laden had come to an end, and hopeful that this was the beginning of the end of terrorism as we know it today.  That is probably too hopeful, as others will fill the shoes left empty by bin Laden.  However, when I saw the wild celebrations, I was a bit saddened.  I posted this on my Facebook Status:

Justice is sweet. Wild celebration is not necessary, though. We should celebrate by remembering the victims.

You see, I felt that it would be more appropriate to remember the victims, and not be boastful about the victory over bin Laden.  Being boastful is not a good habit to get into, because it only sets you up for a fall.  When I saw the celebrations unfolding, I was reminded of some scenes we saw from the Arab world on September 11 where people were dancing in the streets.  I didn’t like those celebrations at that time, and I also felt that the celebrations earlier this week were unwarranted.  They showed no class.  They were an “in your eye” type of reaction.  The US should be better than the people who danced in the streets on 9/11, we should be more composed, more mature, and more introspect.  It’s the smart way to do it.  By celebrating, we are also challenging bin Laden’s followers to retaliate, which I am sure they will try to do.

Usama bin Laden

Yes, there is a major difference between what happened on May 2, 2011 and September 11, 2001.  Usama bin Laden and his Al Qaeda cohorts killed around 3,000 innocents.  On May 2, 2011, those who were killed were not innocent, and had death coming to them, without a doubt.  I still feel, though, that the smart reaction would be to honor those who were slaughtered on 9/11, rather than dance in the streets over the death of bin Laden.

After I posted that Facebook update calling for less boisterous celebration and more remembrance of those who died on 9/11, something funny happened.  There were 107 comments on my update within only a couple of hours.  While nearly everybody agreed and thought it would be smart to be less boisterous, there was one person who just went bonkers.  He started posting foul language, cussing at those who had agreed with my statement.  It was, from what I could see, a demonstration of the exact behavior that I felt was bad for our country on the day when we made a huge step in the War against Terror.  Frankly, it saddened me a great deal.

There is a time for wild parties.  There is a time for celebration.  I, though, personally do not think that the killing of Usama bin Laden called for such behavior.  Yes, I have no problem with people feeling joy over the death of such a terrible person.   Celebration, though, goes a bit too far, in my opinion.

Perhaps your opinion is different?  Let us know by commenting below.

What am I talking about?  What am I contemplating?  Well, a lot of times, I have friends who ask me to critique work that they have done.  Primarily, people ask me to look over their website and critique it.  Basically, what does critique mean?  Well me it means to take a critical look at the work and offer tips or suggestions on how to improve parts of the work that are in need of more attention.  In other words, you must be critical of the work.

Critique Magazine

Eye of the Critique

Problem is, even though who ask for a critique often don’t take the “critical” part very well.  In fact, when you come back and offer your analysis of the work, if you point out anything negative about the work, often you offend the person.  But, honestly, giving the critique should point out the weaknesses, because that is what you have to do to help your friend improve on what he has already done.  You are not trying to put down on the person who did the work, you are trying to help them make it better.

So, it makes me wonder, are they looking for a critique, or are they really trying to get you to look at their work and tell them how good it is?  Maybe they aren’t looking for suggestions on how to improve the work, rather they are looking for praise for a “job well done,” but were afraid to phrase it that way.

I know that I am nearly always wary of offering a critique, even when I have been asked to do so.  This is especially true if the person who is asking for my critique is a good friend, or family.  I mean, I would hate to loose a friendship or a family relationship over a critique that I was asked to give.  Then again, I don’t want to lie to the person when I honestly see areas that need improvement.  Honestly, when I give a critique, I want to help the person do better, just as I would expect them to do if I asked them to critique my work.

So, what do you think?  Do you critique work for friends, family and associates?  Do you give an honest evaluation, or do you sugar coat what you say and just point out the good stuff.  If you only point out the good stuff, is that really a critique?  Is it fair?  To me, I don’t think it is.  Either one.

Yes, if you are a smart person, it’s important to remember to withhold comment on topics if it is something that you know nothing about.  It’s better to not comment than to comment and let everybody know that you are truly a fool.

So many people offer their opinion or comment on things without having any idea on the topic.  Think of all of the things on TV.  Jay Leno has a segment called “Jay Walking” in which he shows videos of Americans commenting on topics which they obviously know nothing about.  Of course, the people come across as fools, and rightly so.

Have a look at this video.  I don’t know the origin of the video, but it appears to be a British TV station.

So, are Americans a bunch of fools?  No, I don’t think they (we) are, but I do think that a lot of Americans like to talk, and often about things of which they know nothing.  No wonder we have a reputation of being stupid.

So, remember, if you are smart, keep your mouth shut, unless you really know about the topic being discussed!